looking back through the bilge archives, i notice with a shudder that i’ve still not written the second [and hopefully concluding] part of my whitby 2004 entry. the thought of having to do so empties me of enthusiasm with each passing day, as the memories fade and the events pass further into history. as if [...]

a friendly pat on the back [with a sledgehammer] to the dickie beasley at fuckwitte, pilloque and spratt who came up with the stunningly original advert currently airing for the halifax building society! the way that office block, weighs anchor and glides off down the street like a frigate, complete with fluttering tarpaulins for sails [...]

egads! – to the salisbury pub last night, with mazza in tow, for the bi-semanal [is that a real word?] pub quiz, only to find that they didnae have enough punters in to justify running it this week. what the feck is going on?! – surely we havenae scared everyone else away by our increasingly [...]